I don’t think any mother sets out to breastfeed this long, including me.  I got pregnant with Grant in 1999 and I remember telling a friend who was in the healthcare field that I’d probably breastfeed for 3 months.  After all, that’s what my mother did.  She told me about the recommendation for 6 months.  I had no idea.... How was I supposed to do it that long?  Then, as I explored more about breastfeeding and infant development, I saw that most recommendations were for breastfeeding for a year.  I didn’t know if I could do it, but I was willing to give it a try.

Grant was born in April of 2000, and he was a big voracious nurser that wanted to feed almost around the clock.  The first 3 months of our lives together are a blur, but I’m feeling confident, save for a few bouts of colic.  I sought out La Leche League because of the colic and found a wonderful support system of local moms who were also having challenges and also some who had some suggestions to make things go smoother.  I remember seeing nursing toddlers at the meeting, which was shocking to me at first.  But then, it became totally normal and natural to me to see moms meeting the needs of their children this way.

I got pregnant with Madeline in the summer of 2002, and Grant kept right on nursing.  That got interesting, as my belly grew to meet the needs of my growing boy.  A lot of children end up giving up as the milk turns to colostrum, but he didn’t.  He said it tasted like lemonade.  That’s the interesting part of nursing a toddler or preschooler.  You get to hear their opinions about the milk and they can ask verbally to nurse.  

After Madeline was born, my milk came in and I remember the first time Grant nursed after that.  His eyes got very big as he took in my milk.  It was like he hit the jackpot LOL.  I only nursed them together once in a while and that’s the part I remember most about tandem nursing.  Grant would lay on my lap and Madeline would cross lay on his lap.  They’d stare into each others eyes, then back and mine, then again intensely at each other.  He’d hold her hand while they nursed.  It was all very sweet.

As he reached almost age 5, I was ready for him to wean.  I had been nursing two for a little over two years.  At first, I just suggested the idea.  At the time, he wanted a guinea pig for a pet.  That was my carrot.  When he weaned, we’d take him to get a guinea pig and that would be his "weaning present".  

Fast forward three years later.  I ask Madeline about weaning, without suggesting it.  She tells me that she’ll let me know when she’s ready, and that’s exactly what ends up happening.  One day, she announced that she wanted to wean.  Then bedtime would come and she’d change her mind.  This went on for a few weeks until finally one day that was that, and she was really done.  She hasn’t nursed since.  

The weaning itself was rather unremarkable.  I’ve read about it before in other mother’s stories about their children’s weaning...that it just sort of happens.  One day, you are nursing three times a day.  Then, just in the morning and before bedtime.  Then, the morning nursings became less and less frequent.  It ebbed and flowed.  If Madeline got sick, then nursing picked back up again.  After she got well, she seemed to get back on track.  It let it happen completely organically... almost like an experiment, because I wanted to see what would happen if I let her take the lead.  Don’t get me wrong... I have refused to nurse her in the past, like in public or when it just wasn’t convenient.  My threshold for nursing in public was age three.  Other mothers may have different feelings about that.   But for the most part, I let her decide when it would be over and it was really neat to watch it all unfold.

We had a small weaning party with the family complete with "boob cake".  She’s really proud of herself for weaning, and feeling like a big girl.

We’ve only had one incident of "Can I nurse again?" and from what I’ve heard and read, it’s totally normal.  Grant did the exact same thing a couple of times, but soon forgot about it.  She’s never mentioned it again.  I know it's only been a few months, but it seems like nursing my kids is in the distant past now.  In fact, while looking through CDs with old photos of my kids I couldn't believe how fast the time has passed.  My little girl is going to kindergarten in a few weeks, and I can hardly believe it.